Unconditional Love

“Yes, everything is set. We'll stop at a diner on our way to Pune and I'll ask her to wait in the diner and order us some food while I fill up the tank. What she won't know is that while she waits for me in the diner, I'll be on my way back to Mumbai,” said Rajeev.

“Are you sure you want to go ahead with this?” asked the person on the other side of the phone.

“Yes,” affirmed Rajeev, although he still sounded a bit nervous.

Rajeev was a thirty-six-year-old investment banker who lived in Chembur, which is an affluent suburb of Mumbai. He lived with his wife Seema, daughter Soni and his recently widowed mother, Divya.

It was eight o'clock in the night and it was time for Rajeev to sit down for dinner. At the dinner table that night, it was only Rajeev and his mother enjoying a sumptuous meal. Seema and Soni were at Seema's parent's place for a couple of days. Divya had cooked Rajeev's favorite — aloo paneer served with freshly made hot roti's and a dash of mango pickle.

Over dinner, Rajeev asked his mother if she'd like to accompany him that weekend for a work trip to Pune. He said that he's required to attend a conference but should finish mid-afternoon after which, they should have time to drive around and explore the area a bit. Divya found the idea interesting so she nodded yes.

A few days later, it was the weekend. Bags were packed and Rajeev and Divya were ready to go. They hopped into the car and hit the road.

On the way, they passed by Rajeev's school. Recalling the school days, Divya said, “Rajeev, do you remember the early morning walks to the school every day? You wouldn't want to wake up in the morning and then we had to rush to school so you could reach there before they closed the gates. I think you did get punished for being late too, didn't you? Oh, those were the good ol' days.”

Rajeev didn't react to this trip down memory lane. He simply continued driving.

Divya noticed this and asked, “Rajeev, do you remember what was your favorite lunch meals?” She knew the answer to this question already but hoped that Rajeev would reply.

“Poha,” replied Rajeev. “The one with diced cooked vegetables and combination sauces. Not only did I like it but it was a hit with my friends as well,” he continued. Rajeev's eyes lit up for a while but then driving got him distracted pretty soon again.

About fifty kilometers passed by. Rajeev had set the car radio to a local radio station that mostly played music but infrequently gave the latest news as well. Breaking the long silence between them, Divya asked, “Would we drive by Imagica on our way to Pune?”

“No, for that we'll have to take a bit of a detour,” replied Rajeev.

“Oh, is that so?” Divya exclaimed. “Do you remember when you were younger we took you to another amusement park in Thane and you almost got lost there? We searched for you for a long time but you were very smart. You approached the security personnel and told them that you wanted to find your parents. That's how we found you. Thank goodness,” Divya sighed with relief as she recollected that incident.

Rajeev looked puzzled as he tried to recollect this episode but he was too young when this might have happened and the chances that he was going to remember this event unfold were slim to none. However, he smiled in acknowledgment and continued driving.

Twenty minutes later, Divya started seeing a lot of signboards indicating that Lonavala was only a few kilometers away. This prompted her to reminisce another story.

Divya said, “Your father used to like to travel to Lonavala a lot — book a small MTDC cottage and rejuvenate himself. He particularly liked to explore Karla caves or just sit by the lake.” After a long pause, Divya continued, “After his demise, we haven't really been there again, have we?”

Rajeev noticed that Divya's voice was breaking up as she remembered his father, so he promptly tried to change the topic to something lighter. “Dad used to take great photographs, right? It was almost like being there in the moment. I think I have one framed in my office, probably taken somewhere in Lonavala.” Rajeev had a grin on his face and looked at his mother to see if she was reciprocating, and fortunately for him, she did.

After about another ninety minutes, the car made a turn for the gravel roads which signified that they were making a stop soon. After about fifty meters of driving on that road, the GPS informed the duo that they had arrived at the diner. The car came to a complete stop but nobody moved. The tension in the car was so thick one could almost cut it with a knife. The journey was both physically and emotionally draining for Rajeev and he couldn't gather the courage to speak any more words.

Sensing Rajeev's hesitation, Divya inquired, “You wanted to drop me off at this diner and go back to Mumbai, right?”

Rajeev looked flushed. He was unable to provide an answer to the question he was just asked as he choked with grief.

“I'll grab my bags from the back seat and get out of your way now.” Divya opened the door and made her way to the backseat.

Rajeev was startled by what Divya had just said. He immediately jumped out of his car and approached his mother who was busy unloading a few bags from the backseat.

“Wait, what? Did you know about this the whole time? How?” Rajeev's voice cracked up as he struggled to contemplate what had just happened and was barely in any position to ask these questions. He was hoping that it was all a misunderstanding and he would somehow manage to fix the situation.

“The other day, I was about to enter your room to ask you something but instead I overheard you talking on the phone. I initially thought it must be work-related and had nothing to do with the family, but when you asked me to accompany you to Pune, my suspicion was confirmed,” Divya explained.

Divya was resisting the urge to breakdown, herself. She was keeping it together as she explained how she had come to know of Rajeev's plan. “I went to bed with tears in my eyes but decided I wouldn't confront you at all. I wanted to see if you would go through with your plans. Unfortunately, for me, you did,” she continued.

Rajeev was deeply ashamed. Although he got the outcome he desired, he never had the courage to face his mother in-person and witness her reaction. His heart sunk but he tried, in complete despair, to convince her that it was going to be alright and to drive back with him — unfortunately, it was all a little too late. Just like you can't put a broken vase back together, there was no way of amending this relationship.

“Don't worry about me now, Rajeev. I can look after myself,” Divya said reassuringly. “I called up a friend who lives near-by. She will meet me at the diner and will provide me with accommodation for a few days before I make arrangements for a permanent home for myself. I think I should consider one of those retirement villages, no?” She paused and looked at Rajeev long enough knowing that she might not see him again anytime soon.

“You should drive back safely now before it gets too dark,” she instructed, this time gently patting the side of his face.

Eventually, all that was left was a silent ride back home for Rajeev, knowing that he had ruined the most pristine thing he could've got in his lifetime without asking and that no amount of regret will ever change anything.